*sigh, is this the end? Or just me being paranoid?

everything was ok for me until when I got home from wing chun at 3pm, saw something that gave one of the biggest shock in my life. I shall not say what it is, but it is about BGR. I know sometime I am being paranoid and shit, but you can't blamed me that I was shocked when I saw that message. I behaved that way because I love her, although I said those words, but you can't blame that because I love her, I reacted that way. I want her happy if she can find it, but something can be sure, I won't be ok for sometime until my heart got used to it. I seriously hoped that message does not implies to her, but to other people that she knows. But it is true, I wished he happy and I will go back to the darkest time of my life. Anyway, my life was in dark for the whole time, nothing has been good for me.